Archives

Facilitators Indeed

Recently I heard something that shook me to the very core of my being. You see we had a programme in SISTERS’ FELLOWSHIP INTERNATIONAL ABUJA AREA. This programme was held at the National Christian Center or as some know it  Ecumenical Center. MY goodness!!!!!!!!. I came out from that programme somewhat drained because I heard things that impacted me so much. By the way the theme of this programme was , ‘THE POWER OF REVELATION’. It was a five day programme. The first day the founder of SFI did the introduction which was to tell us all about revelation. Mrs. Nches Iredu said that if we had revelations we will not  as much as behave the way we do when we are faced with some situations. Ignorance according to her is a delayer and a reducer. She said that it is simply a lack of knowledge, understanding , awareness or education thats why we behave the way we do. I will leave this topic for another day. The second day Mummy Nches as she is fondly called by memebers of SFI spoke to us about FACILITATORS. Siestas na here my tory makpus.

Revelation opens one’s eyes and understanding and makes one’s reasoning different. A woman of understanding according to the founder does not strive, fight or retaliate because the word of God in Romans 8 v 28 applies to her. “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, them who are the called according to (his) purpose”. Rev. Nches Iredu told us that some of the enemies we have seen in lives where really needed. The evil they meant for us sistas if we were patient we would have seen something good comng out that situation. Sistas oooo the people we call or called our enemies where in actual fact our FACILITATORS. When we go for church programmes or fellowship and prayer points are raised for our enemies, chei!!!!!! come and see women praying and jumping up and down that their enemies should fall down and die. But sistas? have you forgotten what Psalm 23 v 5 said, You (Lord) prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies, You anniont my head with oil, my cup runs over”  These (enemies) facilitators are suppossed to be alive so that they will watch you enjoy all that God has for you which sometimes their threats, misdeed or wickedness spurs you to achieve

Lets look at a story in the bible where an enemy (facilitator) helped take a fellow woman like you and I to her blessings. Please turn your bible to 1 Samuel 1 v 1 – 28. My bible tells me that Oga Elkanah married Aunty Hannah o, Kasalla come burst as  Aunty Hannah was barren but her co wife Aunty Penninah (the facilitator in this story) had many children. Oga Elkanah loved Hannah and my babe was contended with her boo’s love. Any time Oga Elkanah goes to abattoir our babe Aunty Hannah will always receive worthy bounteous portion and whenever Oga too sacrified at Shiloh our babe go get plenty meat.  Aunty Hannah needed a baby o but she was very okay with that her barren status. It was not until God used Aunty Penninah that her network returned. I am sure that Hannah must have sent Peninah’s daughter on an errand one day and Peninah provoked (after all she that was the baby making factory was not getting meat and other things) like Hannah from Elkannah and how else was Peninah going to give it to Hannah if it is not to say, “come Dorcas do not go anywhere, let Madam born her own jor and send her child” Can we imagine in so many ways Peninah must have tormented Hannah. Afterall she has been chopping all that meat. Penninah insulted and provoked Hannah terribly. It was this deep provocation that spurred Hannah into action. She was facilitated by our dear Penninah. Hannah out of desperation refused to eat even the ‘worthy portion’. She went to the temple all alone and groaned and entreated  the Lord to bless her with a son. She just wanted to have a son and never even dared to keep him for herself. She wanted to give birth just to prove to the world that she can carry a child in her womb. She went to the extent to even vowing that she would give back the child to God if He God gives her  CHILD. Again she just wanted to prove to the world that she could carry a child in her womb!!!! If Penninah did not keep Hannah uncomfortable she Hannah would not have sought God in desperation to interceed on her behalf.

Let us look at another story in the bible where a facilitator used by God moved a person to do exploit. Genesis 37 v 5 – 11. Joseph was greatly loved by his father Jacob. He was the son of his father old age.. Though second to the last born, he had dreams of greatness. He had the first dream and told his brothers. There was a second dream all indicating that he was going somewhere without his brothers. The brothers were angry with him because of these dreams and they conspired to kill him but later sold him to a band of Ishmaelites traders for twenty pieces of silver. He was bought by Potiphar and in Potiphar’s house the wife started making eyes at Joseph to the extent that she wanted him to sleep with her. When that did not work she said Joseph wanted to rape her. Finally Bros Joe landed in the prison for what he did not do! What seemingly hopeless situations! Everything seemed to be working against our Bros Joe but unknown to him his challenges and enemies were acting as facilitators who were propelling him to his dream.

My sistas people come into our lives and thoroughly mess us up. We are betrayed, gossipped about, humiliated, ignored, not appreciated, looked down at, just name it but if you are a descerning person you will know that all those times you passed through all those things that it made you to take very desperate decisions that eventually led to your glory and God’s glory. Some situations we pass through are stepping stones to our destiny. Do not stay in that bad or ugly situation or acquire enemies left right and center. See them as people that you will surmount be all means. People sent to take you to your permanent site according to Wazobia Fm. Landlords have pursued tenants for no just reasons and in the midst of all that hopelessness you were able to build your own house. An Uncle or Aunt did pay your school fees but in desperation you decided to learn a trade that is bringing much more than you ever thought. These people facilitated you so they should be given award. I hope you are getting the idea.

Shalom

Ursistalways

Advertisements

Allowing God To Work With The Pauses Of Our Lives

Lately I started feeling that God was not sensitive to all the delays (pauses) in my life. Haba! Is He not aware? So much is happening, so much has happened and I am wondering if His heavenly radar is off me. There are things I have been praying for and have prayed for yet no sign! I have been mistreated, I have kept my cool when trampled on. I have tried to be patient with so much ill treatment all in a bid to remain …….. You what? Something changed when I had to read the book of Esther because of a plan I started on YouVersion. Esther showed me that all those pauses I felt were unnecessary delays from God were for a reason . Now let’s see if you will get my drift.

I can almost imagine the scene, a beautifully decorated table adorned with all the king’s favorites from first course to last course…every detail of this important night was purposely planned and executed. Esther was a queen who knew her king, and her king liked banquets….he liked them a lot actually.

So what better way to speak to her king on her people’s behalf than to first invite him and his buddy to a special meal! Come on girls, we all know one of the best ways to our men’s hearts is through their stomachs! Esther was no fool.

But something happened that night at the banquet, somewhere between appetizers and dessert, Esther sensed God guiding her to wait in sharing her request with the king. Imagine how hard that must have been! The pressure of thousands of men, women and children’s lives were at stake. Her words had to be perfect, the meal flawless. Everything needed to go exactly as planned…and then it didn’t. Personally in situations like this, I’d just as rather get it over with than extend the agony of waiting one more day and planning one more dinner party. But not Esther, she was a woman who was willing to wait on the Lord, even if it didn’t make sense to her at the time. Her trust was firmly planted in God, in His will, and in His timing. She was willing to wait if that was what her Lord was guiding her to do.

And so she waited.

“If the king regards me with favor and if it pleases the king to grant my petition and fulfill my request, let the king and Haman come tomorrow to the banquet I will prepare for them. Then I will answer the king’s question.” Esther 5:8

Esther was a queen who knew the power of when to speak and when to remain quiet.

“A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in setting of silver.” Proverbs 25:11

The right words said at the right time, in the right setting, that’s what Esther was aiming for. Sometimes we know what needs to be said, but the timing is off. Esther felt God press the delay button and so she postponed her request.

“God put it into Esther’s heart to delay her petition a day longer; she knew not, but God did, what was to happen in that very night.”- Matthew Henry

God was busy working in Esther’s period of waiting.

He does the same for us.

Sweet friend, don’t be discouraged if you are in a season of waiting. Don’t loose heart if you feel like God has had you press the “pause” button. Maybe it’s the desire to get married, but the right guy hasn’t come into your life yet. Or maybe it’s the desire to start a family, yet God hasn’t blessed you with a child. Maybe, just maybe, it’s in the silence, the unanswered prayers, the delay…the pause of life that God is working behind the scenes, writing an amazing turn of events story that is yet to be revealed.

Sometimes I think God does some of His best work in the “pauses” of our lives.

Don’t lose heart, sweet sister, if you are in a “pause”…you never know what God’s tomorrow will bring.

A sleepless night was on the horizon and an amazing turn of events was in the works.

I believe that you can understand why I have realigned myself to know that He my great God will work out His great purpose for my life in due time. With or without the pauses of my life. In due time He will come through.

Shalom

Personality Traits We Should Loose To Be Better Persons.

Personality traits are distinguishing qualities or characteristics that are the embodiment of an individual. They are your habitual patterns of behavior, temperament and emotion. However in psychology there are five broad dimensions of personality that are used to describe human personality. Every personality trait fall under these five dimensions and they are;

1. Openness to experience: (inventive, curious, consistent, cautious). Appreciation for art, emotion, adventure, unusual ideas. It is also described as the extent to which a person is imaginative or independent, and depicts a personal preference for a variety of activities.

2. Conscientiousness: (efficient, organized, easy-going, careless). A tendency to be organized and dependable, show self-discipline, act dutifully, aim for achievement, and prefer planned rather than spontaneous behavior.

3. Extraversion: (outgoing, energetic, solitary, reserved). Energy, positive emotions, surgency, assertiveness, sociability and the tendency to seek stimulation in the company of others, and talkativeness.

4. Agreeableness: (friendly, compassionate, analytical, detached). A tendency to be compassionate and cooperative rather than suspicious and antagonistic towards others. It is also a measure of one’s trusting and helpful nature, and whether a person is generally well tempered or not.

5. Neuroticism: (sensitive, nervous, secure, confident). The tendency to experience unpleasant emotions easily, such as anger, anxiety, depression, and moodiness.

If unattractive personality traits have started to define you, it’s probably time to leave them in the past and move on to being a better person. You won’t change who you are and how you act overnight; it’s a process. As you shed these unattractive personality traits over time, you’ll find yourself surrounded with good friends and a more well-rounded work environment, not to mention a better relationship with your significant other if you are in a relationship about to be married or married.

1. SELF-DESTRUCTIVE

Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears, the late, Amy Winehouse were all examples of a self destruction. Self-destruction is the epitome of unattractive personality traits and the one that really requires professional help to overcome. If people in your life are asking you to seek help, I hope you’ll consider it.

2. GOSSIP

If you’re talking about friends behind their backs, what kind of friend are you? If you’re repeating things you’ve heard that might or might not be true, you could be forever damaging someone’s reputation. Think twice before saying anything about others, and you’ll find more people will trust you with confidences.

3. UNRELIABLE

One way you can show you are unreliable is not showing up when you have planned to go somewhere with friend/s. This can happen to anyone because of circumstances beyond their control, but when it’s done repeatedly, it’s just a blatant form of disrespect. If you’re going to be late, pick up the phone and call the person waiting for you, and have a good reason to go along with your apology.

4. PESSIMISTIC

One of the nicest things you can do for someone is to be optimistic and show enthusiasm for their plans. Friends or family members that are considering starting a new business, a new relationship or any of a hundred things, would love to hear encouragement instead of all the reasons their plans won’t.

5. MOODY

I love consistency. I love consistency in people. I want to know that the person I’m going to hang out with will be the same agreeable person I have always spent time with last week.

6. BOSSY

If you’re in a leadership position, it could be very tempting to be bossy. Don’t give in to it. Delegating projects to your team should be done in a way that will make them eager to do a great job. Barking orders has the opposite effect. In a friendship or romance, being bossy can be the kiss of death.

7. TOXIC

When you care about someone, the things they say to you not only hurt or encourage you but you tend to believe them. If you have someone or people around you who constantly bring you down by their attitude or what they say to you please let them go. It is only by disassociating yourself from those persons that You will regain your optimism and sense of fun.

8. CONTROLLING

If you’re a controlling person, chances are you won’t recognize the signs in yourself. Hopefully, people in your life will tell you and try to help you. You can just ask yourself simple questions and give honest answers to find out if this is behavior you’re guilty of displaying. When you have the need to regulate someone else’s life, to constantly inform them that your way is the only way, you’re controlling. You should know that sooner or later, the person you are controlling would rid themselves of you and your desire to dominate them.

Are you friends with someone that displays negative personality traits? Have you attempted to discuss it with them? It’s easy to pretend it doesn’t exist for the sake of harmony, but you know that harmony is short-lived when you’re dealing with a person that has personality issues. Life is too short, let’s be careful.

Shalom!

Identifying toxic or negative friends. Don’t kid yourself!

When everything just doesn’t add up, it is time to discover the some interesting ways to identify a negative friendship. You have always been their best girl friend; you’ve helped them every time they’ve asked. But why do you keep receiving the short end of the stick? To establish whether it is time to walk away, let’s learn the some ways to identify a negative friendship. Chai! I think I am the greatest mugu in this world. Friends have dealt with me ooo. Sistas, if you know that you will make a head way in your life this year eh, you better re- asses your relationships with your friends so that you are not pulled back. Here goes.

1. THE OPPORTUNIST
An opportunist never sees the bright side; they only see what’s in it for them, and this marks them as a frenemy, making it easy to identify a negative friendship with them. They utilize their methods of manipulation to take advantage of your kindness and reap all the benefits.

2. ME, ME, ME!
Have you ever noticed that one of your friends must remain the center of attention at all times? The truth about this friend isn’t that she’s confident, and everyone likes her. It’s that she has extremely low self-esteem and wants the focus on her instead of you, because she feels threatened by you. When this becomes an everyday occurrence it’s time to unload this toxic attention hoarder; it’s your turn to shine.

3. ALWAYS THE VICTIM; NEVER THE VILLAIN
Taking responsibility for one’s own actions is a part of becoming a mature adult. If the constant theme with this friend is that she never does anything wrong, she is incapable of seeing her shortcomings. She is irresponsible and will eventually turn the focus of her pity party toward you, at any time that you do not agree with her completely.

4. YOU’RE ALL MINE
At any time that your friend tries to take control over the amount of time you spend with others, it’s time to steer clear of her. This is a red flag implying clearly that she is a control freak. Like the founder of a Sisters Fellowship International, Mummy Nches Iredu will say, such a friend will hijack your bag to pick your phone to know how many people that called you and the ones you spent time talking with. They want to know everything you do per time.

5. SUPERIORITY COMPLEX
Friends who are too afraid to just be themselves, and score friends on their own merit utilize the techniques of the superiority complex to make themselves look better than you. They discuss your private details, especially your failures, with others in an attempt to make themselves appear superior to you. In truth, they fear you and are extremely jealous of your ability to be who you are, as they are too cowardly to do so themselves.

6. THE LACK OF GUMPTION
Toxic friends are incapable of standing up to similar friends. They’re aware fully of the negative attributes of these friends, but will never stand up to them. She will take on a passive attitude toward these friends when they do something negative to you as well. The entire reason that she remains your friend is because she can manipulate you. In truth, she’s highly submissive, herself, and is incapable of handling anyone who stands up to her. Show her that you do have gumption, and you won’t be mistreated.

7. YOU STILL EXIST?
You can call her all day and never get a response, but the moment she needs anything you’d better be there o or else! Does this sound familiar? This is another sign of a one-sided friendship. She needs you to handle her responsibilities for her, but she doesn’t want to repay the favor.

8. THE MOOCH MONSTER
The sad reality is that not all mooch monsters are unemployed. The underlying factor is that they just don’t want to spend their own money, if they can spend yours. You always receive a story of sadden and desperation along with a list of their hardships.

9. THE QUEEN B
She is controlling and manipulative. She believes that she rules every aspect of your life and will deliberately cause drama for you to get what she wants. As I learned the hard way, these toxic friends will even stoop so low as to attempt to use your children to get their way. Negative friends will only bring you down to their level if you stick around. They will wreak havoc on your life and use you at every turn.

Everything you have here is as a result of what I have experienced as well as others I spoke to. Some told me how they quietly and in some cases harshly did away with some nasty friendship. I would love to hear from your my dear Sistas how you handled very toxic friendship. Till next week.

Shalom!

How To Stop Being Envious of Another

Envy is when you as a Sista bears a grudge towards someone due to converting what that person has or enjoy. In a milder sense, it means the longing for something someone else has without any ill will intended towards that person. Envy is a feeling that we all know and feel from time to time, but sometimes we really struggle with it. If that is the situation that you have found yourself in, you can use these ways to stop being envious so that you can push your aspirations, goals etc to its permanent site this year.

1. COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS

One of the best ways to stop being envious is to count your blessings. Focus on what you have, not what others have. I have often heard it said that comparison is the thief of joy and that is very true. Don’t compare what you have to what others have. Simply focus on all of the wonderful things that you have in your life.
2. FIND HAPPINESS FOR THEM WITHIN YOURSELF

It is hard to be envious of those that you are happy for. Use this as an opportunity to work on your inner self. Make a decision to be happy for the person you are envying. Choose to refuse those feelings of envy. When you feel them start to creep up, decide to replace them with other, better feelings. You can tell your feelings how to behave.
3. REMIND YOURSELF THEY MAY HAVE WORKED HARD FOR WHAT THEY HAVE

You know, many times we don’t see what a person has gone through to get where they are. Instead, we only see and focus on the end result. This could be true in many different situations. It could be when we are envying a person for financial stability, weight loss or any number of other things. Remember that there is sometimes more than meets the eye and the person you are envying may very well have worked very hard to get where they are.
4. ACCEPT THAT LIFE ISN’T FAIR

You know, this is just a hard fact of life. Life really isn’t fair. Some people are much more fortunate than others. But what can help is to realize this and accept it. Rather than trying to fight against something that we cannot change, we can just accept it.
5. REMEMBER YOUR TIME WILL COME

Good fortune sometimes comes in waves. Very few of us have good fortune all of our lives in a constant manner. Maybe the person that you are envying is just enjoying a bit of good fortune while yours is not so good. It is good to remember that your time may come. Most of the time, the tide will eventually turn.
6. THINK ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE

If envy is eating at you, make yourself think about something else. Maybe you don’t have it within yourself to be happy for them or to count your blessings. That happens sometimes. But you can choose to think about something else. It could be your job, your flower garden or any number of other things. The point is that you shift your thoughts.
7. REFUSE TO LET IT CONSUME YOU

Envy will eat you up if you are not careful. It is a terrible feeling and it can destroy you. Only you can make the choice not to allow that to happen. You certainly don’t want to give someone the pleasure of allowing their good fortune to devour you. Make yourself move on. You can do that.

Shalom Sista!

How To Overcome Hateful People

I have found out that no matter how friendly and good-hearted you may be, you will always have to deal with hateful people at some point in your life. There are just some individuals out there who enjoy feeding on negative energy and while they might have their own reasons for that, it is never appropriate to put someone else down even if you feel like they deserve it. It is impossible to shield yourself or your loved ones from negativity, so the only things you can do are learn how to deal with hateful people and grow thicker skin. Believe me Sistas, I have been the butt of hateful people who one way or the other tried to take me to their ugly places until I stumbled unto this article. I decided to share this because I know there are a lot of you out there that must have had or is having this my experience. Read and learn as I am learning or have learnt from what I read. Remember, I said I will always bring to you information I read to make our lives better. Enjoy!

1. KEEP CALM

One of the key ways to deal with hateful people is to keep your cool. Difficult and hateful individuals are just waiting to get a reaction from you, but if you show them that their opinions or perspectives mean nothing to you, they will eventually see no point in attacking your character. Plus you don’t want to spent any energy or give your attention to trivial things or people such as them.
2. SWITCH PERSPECTIVES

When somebody is tainting your reputation or trashing you as a person, the first question that comes to mind is ‘Why?’ You begin to brainstorm their motive and try to figure out whether it is something that you have done. Trying to switch your perspective and judging the situation from another point of view may actually be the best thing to do. Figuring out the root of the problem will open your eyes to where that person is coming from and help you rationalize the situation on a deeper level.
3. PICK YOUR BATTLES

While approaching the problem head on and confronting the person directly may often solve the problem, other times the best thing to do is to ignore the negativity altogether. With time, you learn from personal experiences and realize that most personal attacks are not worth your time. Therefore think whether that hateful person really deserves your attention.
4. DON’T STOOP TO THEIR LEVEL

The only way to come out on top in this type of a situation is to not stoop to their level. I know how tempting it may be to point out the other person’s flaws and mistakes when your defense mechanism kicks in, but as Gandhi once said “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.” Instead of making it a bigger deal than it already is, there are classier ways to deal with the situation.
5. UNDERSTAND THAT IT IS THEIR PROBLEM

To be honest, most of the time when an individual attacks another with no real basis for their claim, it really shows more about their character than anyone else’s. If they feel like there is a problem and you don’t, it is something that they should deal with themselves. They may be displacing their anger on you as a result of their own personal problems, in which case it is not something you have to worry about, unless of course that person’s happiness is of your concern.
6. DON’T LET THEIR COMMENTS AFFECT YOU

Words can hurt only if you give them the power to. In order to be mentally strong and withstand any hateful remarks thrown your way, it is important to be confident about yourself and build your owns self-esteem. It is completely possible to feel good about yourself without coming off egocentric or self-absorbed. It just takes a lot of understanding and self-growth as a person.
7. DETACH YOURSELF FROM THAT PERSON

While you should never easily give up on people in your life, sometimes it is important to prioritize relationships and actually see if some of them even worth the work you put into them. Toxic friendships or relationships are never worthy the struggle; they only damage you as a person and leave emotional scars. Therefore don’t be afraid to weed out friendships or any other relationships that are just not healthy. Surround yourself with people who bring you joy and provide support.

One way or another you will have to deal with hateful people, it’s completely inevitable! However it doesn’t mean that you are powerless against them.

Shalom Sistas!

Giving Your Self Confidence A Boost

One of the things I set out to achieve with this blog was to share information on life style, health, home keeping, advocacy, fashion, children, men, finance, relationships of all kind as long as it is pleasing to God and etc. You might need to refresh your memory by visiting the,  ‘About Today’s Sistas Page’, ( thank you for passing by). Now we are going to know about boosting our self confidence, you see I came across this article somewhere and after reading I felt there was need to share it so here we go.

Feeling down is something that happens naturally occasionally. But if you find out that this has become a constant thing with you then SISTA you need something to be done about your self confidence. Self confidence is not only important for success but also  a very attractive quality to friends and the opposite sex. Self confidence can help one in their personal life. To be self confident, you don’t have to be conceited. Confidence is a presence you present. It shows through you being kind, direct, calm and in control. It shows you are capable without being cocky. We women need a little extra self confidence in today’s society which unfortunately keep telling us through all the forms of media that we aren’t worth anything unless we look like a model, wear size 4 or 6 and have a celebrity wardrobe. Sistas, listen you don’t need any of those things to have a great life. Those things don’t make you important, beautiful or better than others. They also don’t automatically give you happiness. Below are some ways you will employ to boost your self confidence the right way and you’ll not only feel happiness but show it too.

 

  • SMILE: Smiling is one of the best ways to boost your self confidence . The act of smiling constitutes SEROTONIN production in the brain which make you happy. We are all more confident when we are happy . Smiling also shows your true self without constraints. When you genuinely smile, it helps you not only appear confident but it feels it too. Smiling is one of the most attractive qualities you can possess, so start grinning and get confident.
  • WEAR YOUR FAVOURITE COLOUR: My favourite color is, hmm! White! it is not that I wear white all the time but it comes in handy on the days I need a boost morally!  I wear it on the days I want to feel more like myself, more together and more sophisticated. For you it could be any colour  but whatever colour it is, wear it and you will naturally feel more confident.
  • DRESS YOUR AGE AND COMFORTABLY: No one feels comfortable when they dress uncomfortably. To all those sistas who want to dress like their teenage daughters when they should not, abeg make una stop am! When you do this you end up tugging this way and that , pulling this way and that . Don’t wear pants or skirts or blouses that are too tight or too loose. No one cares how old you are or what size you wear except you and wouldn’t you rather feel comfortable and look better than fit in a certain size or wear clothes that make you feel frumpy, jor o! I know I would!
  • EAT HEALTHY: When we eat healthy food, our skin looks better and we all  better know we feel better about ourselves when our skin looks better. To look pretty eat pretty. Make sure you eat plenty of fruits and vegetables, lots of green stuff, proteins and healthy fats. Eat less of sugar refined stuff and processed stuff (believe me I am struggling to stop eating them sugar and processed food)
  • SPEAK YOUR MIND: Sometimes when you don’t feel confident you can’t defend yourself, you find it difficult voicing an opinion or give your input in a conversation, but you should. Speaking your mind is a great way to boost your self confidence . You will feel better just by speaking what you feel, even if no one agrees. If everyone else is allowed to give their input, why shouldn’t you?
  • WRITE IT OUT: Writing out your feelings, goals or struggles can be a major self confidence booster. For starters, it allows you to tangibly tap into your head, heart and mind which have been taken over by anxiety, fear and worries. Not writing things down can lead to stress, confusion, and the inability to make decisions. I have a journal where I write down everything and anything that is important to me. I always go back to this journal to remind myself of decisions I took or have taken or about to take. My journal is where I run to when I need to talk to someone and there is nobody.
  • FIND GOOD FRIENDS: If you have friends that always put you down down, this is the time to let them go. If you have friends that are rude, make you feel bad, brings down your self esteem, please let them go. You need to be around people that support you for you.  The right friends might be just around the corner, but you will not find them if you constantly stay around the ones that hurt you instead of support you. Good friends can make us feel more self confident by boosting our self esteem, encouraging us and being  there for us. They also make us laugh and make us feel important.
  • FIND A HOBBY: When you look deep inside you will notice that there is a hobby or talent you really enjoy and you are not pursuing. Indulging in something that interests you is what makes you tick. It engages you, lifts your spirit and gives you confidence. Even if others don’t like or approve of what you are doing but as long as it is making you happy please go on with it. For me it is watching movies, cooking and helping out the needy. To that end I have just registered an NGO to cater to the needs of young girls and women. Every time I am working on this my project I feel excited and on top of the world, what about you?
  • EXERCISE: Aside from your your weight, exercise is such an important activity. It send ENDORPHINS flying throughout your body which not only make you happy, but also make you confident. When you take care of your body, you will automatically feel more confident.
  • GIVE TO OTHERS: One of the best ways to make yourself more confident is to genuinely help other people with the right heart and attitude. You won’t even realize it makes you more confident, but it does. Deep within all of us is the ability and need to help others. Find this part of yourself and become happier, more confident, and more engaged in the world around you. You don’t have to do some massive act either. Get creative and start giving.

Self confidence is easy to achieve when we do these things. Now that I have done my bits I want you my readers to add or share with me those things you do to boost your confidence. It will be fun to see the things we can do to boost our confidence. Shalom!