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How To Love Yourself

Loving who you areLoving yourself is an important part of enjoying and getting the most out of your life. It is crucial for getting and maintaining satisfying relationships with others. Babe loving yourself is mainly having self respect, which is the only dependable way to create love in your own life. To be able to be loved, you must love and respect yourself. Do not allow anybody tell you how your life should be. I am at that point in my life where I  do not have patients for rubbish. I do not allow people to tolerate me, for what kwanu? If you think the sun shine from you and the moon sets with you nne I will shift kiakia from you. Who has time for drama? See sistas create your own activity!!!

Mandy Hale said and I quote,’ If you don’t love yourself, you’ll always be chasing people who don’t love you either’. Trust me sis you don wanna find yourself in this situation cos you will be messed royally. You see all these people you are chasing to validate yourself? They have little little demons that they are fighting with, in my own language I will say they have their own “skoyi skoyi”

There is a story trending this week on instagram. American plus sized yoga instructor, Jessamyn Stanley is a woman confident about herself and about her body. She never shies away from sharing photos of herself practising her act via any social media platform. She said recently in one of her interviews that the world we live in makes it difficult to be confident in yourself( tell me about it). She said that social media is good but just like every other media determines what is accepted, believed, emulated, liked, loved, glamorous etc(Gbamsolutely!!!). As a plus sized woman, she said that her confidence and self love is always evolving. She said that self hate doesn’t go away that it takes work!(Babe talk on oo!)

Jessamyn said that she makes it a point of duty to constantly go back to her drawing table to wipe away yesterday actions and try to release both the good and bad emotions. She advised that one should try to be compassionate towards herself, try to show yourself love instead of hate. Decide that against all odd that you must survive.

I am going to put down a checklist of sort to help us. Some I have been practicing, some I read up as I was looking up materials for this post and they are;

  1. Stop trying to be perfect because nobody is!!!
  2. Stop comparing yourself to others. Babe so you no know say you dey unique ekwa? Na wa to you oo!!!
  3. Be who you really are. Nbok trying to be another person is hard work o.
  4. Try to look past ‘material’ objects and feelings. In this reception(recession) cut your coat according to your wrapper. Figure out what you really want. If looking for that position, power, religion, or motive is time wasting, energy sapping, financial consuming please do jump and pass and move on to something less stressful biko.
  5. Take things one day at a time.
  6. Learn to let go of past events.
  7. Forgive yourself a lot ooooo.
  8. Define yourself by your effort not your accomplishment (hmmmm!!!)
  9. Sit in front of the mirror productively( sounds oyiboish) You have to learn howto do this according to experts. Validate yourself when you sit in front of the mirror. Encourage yourself always.
  10. Nurture yourself. Here I need to expartiate a little. Self care is very important. Set up time to be by yourself . You can nurture yourself physically, emotionally, financially and spiritually.
  11. Treat yourself like you will treat your best friend.
  12. express yourself. Find out what hobbies you enjoy and use it to express yourself.
  13. Practice saying ‘no’. My sista it is very ok to say no to people when you do not feel like doing something. Do not feel guilty about it. Just realize that you have the right to do so.

However I must warn that as you are loving yourself and doing all that I have suggested that you:

  1. Your problems give you opportunities to develop skills, abilities and your character.
  2. Loving your self does not mean grabbing all of the attention and becoming selfish.
  3. Trust who you are and decide the answers for you. Do not alter yourself because of the things people say.
  4. Trust your own judgement. Everything suggested, while it may work for the person who added it, might not work for you. Learn to trust yourself as that is a big part of self love.
  5. Loving oneself is not the same as narcissism, which is negative and a huge turn-off to others as it involves placing oneself above others.
  6. Misery loves company, so do not hang around unhappy, frowning and grouchy people.
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Facilitators Indeed

Recently I heard something that shook me to the very core of my being. You see we had a programme in SISTERS’ FELLOWSHIP INTERNATIONAL ABUJA AREA. This programme was held at the National Christian Center or as some know it  Ecumenical Center. MY goodness!!!!!!!!. I came out from that programme somewhat drained because I heard things that impacted me so much. By the way the theme of this programme was , ‘THE POWER OF REVELATION’. It was a five day programme. The first day the founder of SFI did the introduction which was to tell us all about revelation. Mrs. Nches Iredu said that if we had revelations we will not  as much as behave the way we do when we are faced with some situations. Ignorance according to her is a delayer and a reducer. She said that it is simply a lack of knowledge, understanding , awareness or education thats why we behave the way we do. I will leave this topic for another day. The second day Mummy Nches as she is fondly called by memebers of SFI spoke to us about FACILITATORS. Siestas na here my tory makpus.

Revelation opens one’s eyes and understanding and makes one’s reasoning different. A woman of understanding according to the founder does not strive, fight or retaliate because the word of God in Romans 8 v 28 applies to her. “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, them who are the called according to (his) purpose”. Rev. Nches Iredu told us that some of the enemies we have seen in lives where really needed. The evil they meant for us sistas if we were patient we would have seen something good comng out that situation. Sistas oooo the people we call or called our enemies where in actual fact our FACILITATORS. When we go for church programmes or fellowship and prayer points are raised for our enemies, chei!!!!!! come and see women praying and jumping up and down that their enemies should fall down and die. But sistas? have you forgotten what Psalm 23 v 5 said, You (Lord) prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies, You anniont my head with oil, my cup runs over”  These (enemies) facilitators are suppossed to be alive so that they will watch you enjoy all that God has for you which sometimes their threats, misdeed or wickedness spurs you to achieve

Lets look at a story in the bible where an enemy (facilitator) helped take a fellow woman like you and I to her blessings. Please turn your bible to 1 Samuel 1 v 1 – 28. My bible tells me that Oga Elkanah married Aunty Hannah o, Kasalla come burst as  Aunty Hannah was barren but her co wife Aunty Penninah (the facilitator in this story) had many children. Oga Elkanah loved Hannah and my babe was contended with her boo’s love. Any time Oga Elkanah goes to abattoir our babe Aunty Hannah will always receive worthy bounteous portion and whenever Oga too sacrified at Shiloh our babe go get plenty meat.  Aunty Hannah needed a baby o but she was very okay with that her barren status. It was not until God used Aunty Penninah that her network returned. I am sure that Hannah must have sent Peninah’s daughter on an errand one day and Peninah provoked (after all she that was the baby making factory was not getting meat and other things) like Hannah from Elkannah and how else was Peninah going to give it to Hannah if it is not to say, “come Dorcas do not go anywhere, let Madam born her own jor and send her child” Can we imagine in so many ways Peninah must have tormented Hannah. Afterall she has been chopping all that meat. Penninah insulted and provoked Hannah terribly. It was this deep provocation that spurred Hannah into action. She was facilitated by our dear Penninah. Hannah out of desperation refused to eat even the ‘worthy portion’. She went to the temple all alone and groaned and entreated  the Lord to bless her with a son. She just wanted to have a son and never even dared to keep him for herself. She wanted to give birth just to prove to the world that she can carry a child in her womb. She went to the extent to even vowing that she would give back the child to God if He God gives her  CHILD. Again she just wanted to prove to the world that she could carry a child in her womb!!!! If Penninah did not keep Hannah uncomfortable she Hannah would not have sought God in desperation to interceed on her behalf.

Let us look at another story in the bible where a facilitator used by God moved a person to do exploit. Genesis 37 v 5 – 11. Joseph was greatly loved by his father Jacob. He was the son of his father old age.. Though second to the last born, he had dreams of greatness. He had the first dream and told his brothers. There was a second dream all indicating that he was going somewhere without his brothers. The brothers were angry with him because of these dreams and they conspired to kill him but later sold him to a band of Ishmaelites traders for twenty pieces of silver. He was bought by Potiphar and in Potiphar’s house the wife started making eyes at Joseph to the extent that she wanted him to sleep with her. When that did not work she said Joseph wanted to rape her. Finally Bros Joe landed in the prison for what he did not do! What seemingly hopeless situations! Everything seemed to be working against our Bros Joe but unknown to him his challenges and enemies were acting as facilitators who were propelling him to his dream.

My sistas people come into our lives and thoroughly mess us up. We are betrayed, gossipped about, humiliated, ignored, not appreciated, looked down at, just name it but if you are a descerning person you will know that all those times you passed through all those things that it made you to take very desperate decisions that eventually led to your glory and God’s glory. Some situations we pass through are stepping stones to our destiny. Do not stay in that bad or ugly situation or acquire enemies left right and center. See them as people that you will surmount be all means. People sent to take you to your permanent site according to Wazobia Fm. Landlords have pursued tenants for no just reasons and in the midst of all that hopelessness you were able to build your own house. An Uncle or Aunt did pay your school fees but in desperation you decided to learn a trade that is bringing much more than you ever thought. These people facilitated you so they should be given award. I hope you are getting the idea.

Shalom

Ursistalways

Allowing God To Work With The Pauses Of Our Lives

Lately I started feeling that God was not sensitive to all the delays (pauses) in my life. Haba! Is He not aware? So much is happening, so much has happened and I am wondering if His heavenly radar is off me. There are things I have been praying for and have prayed for yet no sign! I have been mistreated, I have kept my cool when trampled on. I have tried to be patient with so much ill treatment all in a bid to remain …….. You what? Something changed when I had to read the book of Esther because of a plan I started on YouVersion. Esther showed me that all those pauses I felt were unnecessary delays from God were for a reason . Now let’s see if you will get my drift.

I can almost imagine the scene, a beautifully decorated table adorned with all the king’s favorites from first course to last course…every detail of this important night was purposely planned and executed. Esther was a queen who knew her king, and her king liked banquets….he liked them a lot actually.

So what better way to speak to her king on her people’s behalf than to first invite him and his buddy to a special meal! Come on girls, we all know one of the best ways to our men’s hearts is through their stomachs! Esther was no fool.

But something happened that night at the banquet, somewhere between appetizers and dessert, Esther sensed God guiding her to wait in sharing her request with the king. Imagine how hard that must have been! The pressure of thousands of men, women and children’s lives were at stake. Her words had to be perfect, the meal flawless. Everything needed to go exactly as planned…and then it didn’t. Personally in situations like this, I’d just as rather get it over with than extend the agony of waiting one more day and planning one more dinner party. But not Esther, she was a woman who was willing to wait on the Lord, even if it didn’t make sense to her at the time. Her trust was firmly planted in God, in His will, and in His timing. She was willing to wait if that was what her Lord was guiding her to do.

And so she waited.

“If the king regards me with favor and if it pleases the king to grant my petition and fulfill my request, let the king and Haman come tomorrow to the banquet I will prepare for them. Then I will answer the king’s question.” Esther 5:8

Esther was a queen who knew the power of when to speak and when to remain quiet.

“A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in setting of silver.” Proverbs 25:11

The right words said at the right time, in the right setting, that’s what Esther was aiming for. Sometimes we know what needs to be said, but the timing is off. Esther felt God press the delay button and so she postponed her request.

“God put it into Esther’s heart to delay her petition a day longer; she knew not, but God did, what was to happen in that very night.”- Matthew Henry

God was busy working in Esther’s period of waiting.

He does the same for us.

Sweet friend, don’t be discouraged if you are in a season of waiting. Don’t loose heart if you feel like God has had you press the “pause” button. Maybe it’s the desire to get married, but the right guy hasn’t come into your life yet. Or maybe it’s the desire to start a family, yet God hasn’t blessed you with a child. Maybe, just maybe, it’s in the silence, the unanswered prayers, the delay…the pause of life that God is working behind the scenes, writing an amazing turn of events story that is yet to be revealed.

Sometimes I think God does some of His best work in the “pauses” of our lives.

Don’t lose heart, sweet sister, if you are in a “pause”…you never know what God’s tomorrow will bring.

A sleepless night was on the horizon and an amazing turn of events was in the works.

I believe that you can understand why I have realigned myself to know that He my great God will work out His great purpose for my life in due time. With or without the pauses of my life. In due time He will come through.

Shalom

Personality Traits We Should Loose To Be Better Persons.

Personality traits are distinguishing qualities or characteristics that are the embodiment of an individual. They are your habitual patterns of behavior, temperament and emotion. However in psychology there are five broad dimensions of personality that are used to describe human personality. Every personality trait fall under these five dimensions and they are;

1. Openness to experience: (inventive, curious, consistent, cautious). Appreciation for art, emotion, adventure, unusual ideas. It is also described as the extent to which a person is imaginative or independent, and depicts a personal preference for a variety of activities.

2. Conscientiousness: (efficient, organized, easy-going, careless). A tendency to be organized and dependable, show self-discipline, act dutifully, aim for achievement, and prefer planned rather than spontaneous behavior.

3. Extraversion: (outgoing, energetic, solitary, reserved). Energy, positive emotions, surgency, assertiveness, sociability and the tendency to seek stimulation in the company of others, and talkativeness.

4. Agreeableness: (friendly, compassionate, analytical, detached). A tendency to be compassionate and cooperative rather than suspicious and antagonistic towards others. It is also a measure of one’s trusting and helpful nature, and whether a person is generally well tempered or not.

5. Neuroticism: (sensitive, nervous, secure, confident). The tendency to experience unpleasant emotions easily, such as anger, anxiety, depression, and moodiness.

If unattractive personality traits have started to define you, it’s probably time to leave them in the past and move on to being a better person. You won’t change who you are and how you act overnight; it’s a process. As you shed these unattractive personality traits over time, you’ll find yourself surrounded with good friends and a more well-rounded work environment, not to mention a better relationship with your significant other if you are in a relationship about to be married or married.

1. SELF-DESTRUCTIVE

Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears, the late, Amy Winehouse were all examples of a self destruction. Self-destruction is the epitome of unattractive personality traits and the one that really requires professional help to overcome. If people in your life are asking you to seek help, I hope you’ll consider it.

2. GOSSIP

If you’re talking about friends behind their backs, what kind of friend are you? If you’re repeating things you’ve heard that might or might not be true, you could be forever damaging someone’s reputation. Think twice before saying anything about others, and you’ll find more people will trust you with confidences.

3. UNRELIABLE

One way you can show you are unreliable is not showing up when you have planned to go somewhere with friend/s. This can happen to anyone because of circumstances beyond their control, but when it’s done repeatedly, it’s just a blatant form of disrespect. If you’re going to be late, pick up the phone and call the person waiting for you, and have a good reason to go along with your apology.

4. PESSIMISTIC

One of the nicest things you can do for someone is to be optimistic and show enthusiasm for their plans. Friends or family members that are considering starting a new business, a new relationship or any of a hundred things, would love to hear encouragement instead of all the reasons their plans won’t.

5. MOODY

I love consistency. I love consistency in people. I want to know that the person I’m going to hang out with will be the same agreeable person I have always spent time with last week.

6. BOSSY

If you’re in a leadership position, it could be very tempting to be bossy. Don’t give in to it. Delegating projects to your team should be done in a way that will make them eager to do a great job. Barking orders has the opposite effect. In a friendship or romance, being bossy can be the kiss of death.

7. TOXIC

When you care about someone, the things they say to you not only hurt or encourage you but you tend to believe them. If you have someone or people around you who constantly bring you down by their attitude or what they say to you please let them go. It is only by disassociating yourself from those persons that You will regain your optimism and sense of fun.

8. CONTROLLING

If you’re a controlling person, chances are you won’t recognize the signs in yourself. Hopefully, people in your life will tell you and try to help you. You can just ask yourself simple questions and give honest answers to find out if this is behavior you’re guilty of displaying. When you have the need to regulate someone else’s life, to constantly inform them that your way is the only way, you’re controlling. You should know that sooner or later, the person you are controlling would rid themselves of you and your desire to dominate them.

Are you friends with someone that displays negative personality traits? Have you attempted to discuss it with them? It’s easy to pretend it doesn’t exist for the sake of harmony, but you know that harmony is short-lived when you’re dealing with a person that has personality issues. Life is too short, let’s be careful.

Shalom!

Identifying toxic or negative friends. Don’t kid yourself!

When everything just doesn’t add up, it is time to discover the some interesting ways to identify a negative friendship. You have always been their best girl friend; you’ve helped them every time they’ve asked. But why do you keep receiving the short end of the stick? To establish whether it is time to walk away, let’s learn the some ways to identify a negative friendship. Chai! I think I am the greatest mugu in this world. Friends have dealt with me ooo. Sistas, if you know that you will make a head way in your life this year eh, you better re- asses your relationships with your friends so that you are not pulled back. Here goes.

1. THE OPPORTUNIST
An opportunist never sees the bright side; they only see what’s in it for them, and this marks them as a frenemy, making it easy to identify a negative friendship with them. They utilize their methods of manipulation to take advantage of your kindness and reap all the benefits.

2. ME, ME, ME!
Have you ever noticed that one of your friends must remain the center of attention at all times? The truth about this friend isn’t that she’s confident, and everyone likes her. It’s that she has extremely low self-esteem and wants the focus on her instead of you, because she feels threatened by you. When this becomes an everyday occurrence it’s time to unload this toxic attention hoarder; it’s your turn to shine.

3. ALWAYS THE VICTIM; NEVER THE VILLAIN
Taking responsibility for one’s own actions is a part of becoming a mature adult. If the constant theme with this friend is that she never does anything wrong, she is incapable of seeing her shortcomings. She is irresponsible and will eventually turn the focus of her pity party toward you, at any time that you do not agree with her completely.

4. YOU’RE ALL MINE
At any time that your friend tries to take control over the amount of time you spend with others, it’s time to steer clear of her. This is a red flag implying clearly that she is a control freak. Like the founder of a Sisters Fellowship International, Mummy Nches Iredu will say, such a friend will hijack your bag to pick your phone to know how many people that called you and the ones you spent time talking with. They want to know everything you do per time.

5. SUPERIORITY COMPLEX
Friends who are too afraid to just be themselves, and score friends on their own merit utilize the techniques of the superiority complex to make themselves look better than you. They discuss your private details, especially your failures, with others in an attempt to make themselves appear superior to you. In truth, they fear you and are extremely jealous of your ability to be who you are, as they are too cowardly to do so themselves.

6. THE LACK OF GUMPTION
Toxic friends are incapable of standing up to similar friends. They’re aware fully of the negative attributes of these friends, but will never stand up to them. She will take on a passive attitude toward these friends when they do something negative to you as well. The entire reason that she remains your friend is because she can manipulate you. In truth, she’s highly submissive, herself, and is incapable of handling anyone who stands up to her. Show her that you do have gumption, and you won’t be mistreated.

7. YOU STILL EXIST?
You can call her all day and never get a response, but the moment she needs anything you’d better be there o or else! Does this sound familiar? This is another sign of a one-sided friendship. She needs you to handle her responsibilities for her, but she doesn’t want to repay the favor.

8. THE MOOCH MONSTER
The sad reality is that not all mooch monsters are unemployed. The underlying factor is that they just don’t want to spend their own money, if they can spend yours. You always receive a story of sadden and desperation along with a list of their hardships.

9. THE QUEEN B
She is controlling and manipulative. She believes that she rules every aspect of your life and will deliberately cause drama for you to get what she wants. As I learned the hard way, these toxic friends will even stoop so low as to attempt to use your children to get their way. Negative friends will only bring you down to their level if you stick around. They will wreak havoc on your life and use you at every turn.

Everything you have here is as a result of what I have experienced as well as others I spoke to. Some told me how they quietly and in some cases harshly did away with some nasty friendship. I would love to hear from your my dear Sistas how you handled very toxic friendship. Till next week.

Shalom!

How To Stop Being Envious of Another

Envy is when you as a Sista bears a grudge towards someone due to converting what that person has or enjoy. In a milder sense, it means the longing for something someone else has without any ill will intended towards that person. Envy is a feeling that we all know and feel from time to time, but sometimes we really struggle with it. If that is the situation that you have found yourself in, you can use these ways to stop being envious so that you can push your aspirations, goals etc to its permanent site this year.

1. COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS

One of the best ways to stop being envious is to count your blessings. Focus on what you have, not what others have. I have often heard it said that comparison is the thief of joy and that is very true. Don’t compare what you have to what others have. Simply focus on all of the wonderful things that you have in your life.
2. FIND HAPPINESS FOR THEM WITHIN YOURSELF

It is hard to be envious of those that you are happy for. Use this as an opportunity to work on your inner self. Make a decision to be happy for the person you are envying. Choose to refuse those feelings of envy. When you feel them start to creep up, decide to replace them with other, better feelings. You can tell your feelings how to behave.
3. REMIND YOURSELF THEY MAY HAVE WORKED HARD FOR WHAT THEY HAVE

You know, many times we don’t see what a person has gone through to get where they are. Instead, we only see and focus on the end result. This could be true in many different situations. It could be when we are envying a person for financial stability, weight loss or any number of other things. Remember that there is sometimes more than meets the eye and the person you are envying may very well have worked very hard to get where they are.
4. ACCEPT THAT LIFE ISN’T FAIR

You know, this is just a hard fact of life. Life really isn’t fair. Some people are much more fortunate than others. But what can help is to realize this and accept it. Rather than trying to fight against something that we cannot change, we can just accept it.
5. REMEMBER YOUR TIME WILL COME

Good fortune sometimes comes in waves. Very few of us have good fortune all of our lives in a constant manner. Maybe the person that you are envying is just enjoying a bit of good fortune while yours is not so good. It is good to remember that your time may come. Most of the time, the tide will eventually turn.
6. THINK ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE

If envy is eating at you, make yourself think about something else. Maybe you don’t have it within yourself to be happy for them or to count your blessings. That happens sometimes. But you can choose to think about something else. It could be your job, your flower garden or any number of other things. The point is that you shift your thoughts.
7. REFUSE TO LET IT CONSUME YOU

Envy will eat you up if you are not careful. It is a terrible feeling and it can destroy you. Only you can make the choice not to allow that to happen. You certainly don’t want to give someone the pleasure of allowing their good fortune to devour you. Make yourself move on. You can do that.

Shalom Sista!

How To Overcome Hateful People

I have found out that no matter how friendly and good-hearted you may be, you will always have to deal with hateful people at some point in your life. There are just some individuals out there who enjoy feeding on negative energy and while they might have their own reasons for that, it is never appropriate to put someone else down even if you feel like they deserve it. It is impossible to shield yourself or your loved ones from negativity, so the only things you can do are learn how to deal with hateful people and grow thicker skin. Believe me Sistas, I have been the butt of hateful people who one way or the other tried to take me to their ugly places until I stumbled unto this article. I decided to share this because I know there are a lot of you out there that must have had or is having this my experience. Read and learn as I am learning or have learnt from what I read. Remember, I said I will always bring to you information I read to make our lives better. Enjoy!

1. KEEP CALM

One of the key ways to deal with hateful people is to keep your cool. Difficult and hateful individuals are just waiting to get a reaction from you, but if you show them that their opinions or perspectives mean nothing to you, they will eventually see no point in attacking your character. Plus you don’t want to spent any energy or give your attention to trivial things or people such as them.
2. SWITCH PERSPECTIVES

When somebody is tainting your reputation or trashing you as a person, the first question that comes to mind is ‘Why?’ You begin to brainstorm their motive and try to figure out whether it is something that you have done. Trying to switch your perspective and judging the situation from another point of view may actually be the best thing to do. Figuring out the root of the problem will open your eyes to where that person is coming from and help you rationalize the situation on a deeper level.
3. PICK YOUR BATTLES

While approaching the problem head on and confronting the person directly may often solve the problem, other times the best thing to do is to ignore the negativity altogether. With time, you learn from personal experiences and realize that most personal attacks are not worth your time. Therefore think whether that hateful person really deserves your attention.
4. DON’T STOOP TO THEIR LEVEL

The only way to come out on top in this type of a situation is to not stoop to their level. I know how tempting it may be to point out the other person’s flaws and mistakes when your defense mechanism kicks in, but as Gandhi once said “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.” Instead of making it a bigger deal than it already is, there are classier ways to deal with the situation.
5. UNDERSTAND THAT IT IS THEIR PROBLEM

To be honest, most of the time when an individual attacks another with no real basis for their claim, it really shows more about their character than anyone else’s. If they feel like there is a problem and you don’t, it is something that they should deal with themselves. They may be displacing their anger on you as a result of their own personal problems, in which case it is not something you have to worry about, unless of course that person’s happiness is of your concern.
6. DON’T LET THEIR COMMENTS AFFECT YOU

Words can hurt only if you give them the power to. In order to be mentally strong and withstand any hateful remarks thrown your way, it is important to be confident about yourself and build your owns self-esteem. It is completely possible to feel good about yourself without coming off egocentric or self-absorbed. It just takes a lot of understanding and self-growth as a person.
7. DETACH YOURSELF FROM THAT PERSON

While you should never easily give up on people in your life, sometimes it is important to prioritize relationships and actually see if some of them even worth the work you put into them. Toxic friendships or relationships are never worthy the struggle; they only damage you as a person and leave emotional scars. Therefore don’t be afraid to weed out friendships or any other relationships that are just not healthy. Surround yourself with people who bring you joy and provide support.

One way or another you will have to deal with hateful people, it’s completely inevitable! However it doesn’t mean that you are powerless against them.

Shalom Sistas!