I have found out that no matter how friendly and good-hearted you may be, you will always have to deal with hateful people at some point in your life. There are just some individuals out there who enjoy feeding on negative energy and while they might have their own reasons for that, it is never appropriate to put someone else down even if you feel like they deserve it. It is impossible to shield yourself or your loved ones from negativity, so the only things you can do are learn how to deal with hateful people and grow thicker skin. Believe me Sistas, I have been the butt of hateful people who one way or the other tried to take me to their ugly places until I stumbled unto this article. I decided to share this because I know there are a lot of you out there that must have had or is having this my experience. Read and learn as I am learning or have learnt from what I read. Remember, I said I will always bring to you information I read to make our lives better. Enjoy!
1. KEEP CALM
One of the key ways to deal with hateful people is to keep your cool. Difficult and hateful individuals are just waiting to get a reaction from you, but if you show them that their opinions or perspectives mean nothing to you, they will eventually see no point in attacking your character. Plus you don’t want to spent any energy or give your attention to trivial things or people such as them.
2. SWITCH PERSPECTIVES
When somebody is tainting your reputation or trashing you as a person, the first question that comes to mind is ‘Why?’ You begin to brainstorm their motive and try to figure out whether it is something that you have done. Trying to switch your perspective and judging the situation from another point of view may actually be the best thing to do. Figuring out the root of the problem will open your eyes to where that person is coming from and help you rationalize the situation on a deeper level.
3. PICK YOUR BATTLES
While approaching the problem head on and confronting the person directly may often solve the problem, other times the best thing to do is to ignore the negativity altogether. With time, you learn from personal experiences and realize that most personal attacks are not worth your time. Therefore think whether that hateful person really deserves your attention.
4. DON’T STOOP TO THEIR LEVEL
The only way to come out on top in this type of a situation is to not stoop to their level. I know how tempting it may be to point out the other person’s flaws and mistakes when your defense mechanism kicks in, but as Gandhi once said “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.” Instead of making it a bigger deal than it already is, there are classier ways to deal with the situation.
5. UNDERSTAND THAT IT IS THEIR PROBLEM
To be honest, most of the time when an individual attacks another with no real basis for their claim, it really shows more about their character than anyone else’s. If they feel like there is a problem and you don’t, it is something that they should deal with themselves. They may be displacing their anger on you as a result of their own personal problems, in which case it is not something you have to worry about, unless of course that person’s happiness is of your concern.
6. DON’T LET THEIR COMMENTS AFFECT YOU
Words can hurt only if you give them the power to. In order to be mentally strong and withstand any hateful remarks thrown your way, it is important to be confident about yourself and build your owns self-esteem. It is completely possible to feel good about yourself without coming off egocentric or self-absorbed. It just takes a lot of understanding and self-growth as a person.
7. DETACH YOURSELF FROM THAT PERSON
While you should never easily give up on people in your life, sometimes it is important to prioritize relationships and actually see if some of them even worth the work you put into them. Toxic friendships or relationships are never worthy the struggle; they only damage you as a person and leave emotional scars. Therefore don’t be afraid to weed out friendships or any other relationships that are just not healthy. Surround yourself with people who bring you joy and provide support.
One way or another you will have to deal with hateful people, it’s completely inevitable! However it doesn’t mean that you are powerless against them.